Tuesday, May 22, 2012

I Like a Challenge

Do you ever have those days when you are constantly on your feet, running in circles, yelling things like, "Don't touch that!" or "I don't want to see that in your mouth again!"  Yeah. Me too. I am ragged and it's only lunch time. I even spent an hour (kid free) at the dentist - thankfully, I didn't have to yell at anyone while I was there :)

I don't know what it is that causes my daughter to turn into a tiny, hyped-up hooligan at times, but Lord knows I would pay money for an antidote. Can I be honest for a minute? ... Those types of episodes are really few and far between at our house. I am grateful for the laid back personality that she inherited from her father. But maybe that's what causes me to feel more stressed - because it's a behavior that I'm not used to.

Now, of course, like any normal child, she can turn on   a   dime.

That eye twinkle and smirk that flash in front of me as I try to reach out and grab her before she takes off running like a banshee {sometimes naked} through the house. Every so often I start to think I might not catch her. And all the while, she squeals and laughs uncontrollably, thinking she is the most clever person to ever be born.

Yes, on these days I am tired.  Tired of running.  Tired of correcting. Tired of anticipating what kind of chaos is going to happen next.  Can I get an "Amen" for nap time?  In this life of mine - the one where I am called Mommy, I might have moments of panic. There may be times when I think I've failed. When all I can do is sit down and cry.

Through all the fatigue, through the days spent wearing my fanciest sweatpants, through mornings of skipping showers so I can sleep in a little longer, I know my heart wouldn't trade it for anything. This is where God put me. I am a mom and I get the WHOLE package. Not just the glamorous parts. Being a mother isn't a pick and choose gig. I am learning that often it's through the messy parts - when I am feeling most inadequate, that I am being stretched and challenged. Through this dirt and grime in my soul, God smiles and shows me my strengths. He proves to me what I'm capable of achieving if I can just endure the race a little longer. It's a beautiful thing - discovering more about who you really are {who God made you to be} when you rise to the challenge of being a parent and can accept both the glamorous AND the gritty.
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